Adina Howards's Nasty Grind in and out of the bedroom
R&B seductress, Adina Howard, was definitely a woman beyond her time. Adina’s Freak Like Me became one of the top-selling singles and the most played music video on MTV and BET. Her explosive debut album, Do You Wanna Ride? went Platinum in 1995, and made her one of R&B’s most sought after female artists in the industry. Since the success of her first album, Adina’s Welcome to Fantasy Island, The Second Coming, and Private Show continues to seduce fans with her sexual lyrics and nasty grind.
She gave sex soul and graced men and women all over with her sexy voice, hour-glass figure, and sexually liberating music that wraps around your body like a glove. Even after marriage, Adina is still a freak and is still sexy. Adina continues to stimulate audiences and keeps places in our bodies tingling that we might not have known existed. Not only does she stimulate our bodies, but Adina also stimulates our minds in this candid interview. Being a wife has taught her a lot, but her sex appeal, soulful sound, alluring body, and nasty grind still remains.
We had the opportunity to speak to Adina Howard and she gave us the lowdown about the bisexual rumors, her hot new documentary, A Story of Sexual Liberation, and her new album, The Switch-Up.
Hi Adina, how are you?
Adina: I’m blessed, how are you?
Florence: I’m doing well, thanks! I’m here with my assistant, Charla Mackey.
Florence: Thank you for taking the time to speak with us today. It’s definitely a dream come true for me.
Adina: Aww!
Florence: I appreciate your work as an artist and business woman. You’re a great role model for women because you follow your heart, live your dreams and let God guide you, so we wanted to congratulate you on all of your success.
Adina: Wow. Thank you. You’ve just added to my cup. It’s interesting for me because when I hear sistas give it up to another sista, and especially if I’m on the receiving end, it means a whole lot! I appreciate you for appreciating me. Thank you for adding that to my life. It validates for me that I am living my purpose, so thank you!
Charla: We’ve really followed your career and noticed in your interviews that you kind of had to say, “I’m sexy and cute, but there’s substance to me.” I am a woman of substance. We want people to see a little more than just booty, (laughs). Booty is nice, but there are so many layers to you and we see that. Adina: Thank you! I’m glad you said that.
Charla: I want to congratulate you because we saw you on Life After, and we learned you had gotten married and were going to culinary arts school. We want to congratulate you for materializing that because you did that!
Adina: Thank you (laughs). Thank you so much.
Charla: Did you ever think in your wildest dreams that you’d be married? You said you didn’t want to be married.
Adina: Hell naw! (laughs). I honestly in a million years couldn’t have imagined being married because being married was something I didn’t ever want for me. I never looked at wanting to be tied down to somebody. Commitment was not for me. I liked to be, do and have as I chose. So, to choose commitment for someone who has a phobia of commitment, I was like, “Ok, let me just try it out.”
The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results. I was trying to stop insanity only to jump into something else that was insane to me. I’ve been single longer than I’ve been married so I’m having to purge, transform, compromise and be a little more selfless and considerate.
That hasn’t ever really been me because I’m the first born, so out of the gate, I was spoiled. For me, guys just didn’t deserve all of that so to be married now is like, wow! To want to be married, to want to work out all of the difficult stuff means that you are growing. I say to myself, how fabulous are you right now! My life is completely unrecognizable. It’s like wow, really!
Charla: There’s definitely a transformation there because when I saw you on TV, it was no more laying on the bed… Adina: I’m still laying on the bed, what are you talking about! (laughs).
Charla: I was looking on the internet and I saw a photo of you wearing glasses. I was like, “Ok, she looks so plain now.” Then, all of a sudden, I looked at your performance at LA Pride and a few other venues on Youtube, and saw you grinding on one of the fans. How does your husband feel about it? He doesn’t have a problem with that?
Adina: No, he doesn’t. He’s actually gone to a couple of my shows and he’s been on stage. My husband’s known me since 96-97. What’s interesting is we met in my late teens and vaguely remember meeting, but we knew we had met. When I became quote unquote, “Adina Howard,” we were at the LAX airport and he asked about my sister. So I thought, If you’re asking about my sister, that means you’re alright with me.
You’ve been around my people so I kind of relaxed a little bit. He and I started talking. It was interesting because every time we met up, it would always be in passing at the LAX airport. One day, he reached out to me at the airport and said take my number and whenever you feel like talking, just hit me up. He and I started dating at some point within that year, so he’s always known that side of me because he and I dated when I was in my prime of being Adina Howard.
He’s always been comfortable and I’ve always given him a reason to trust me. At the end of the day, if I commit to you, I commit to you. Because he knows who I am in that regard, he doesn’t have a problem because he knows that Adina Howard is exactly who they are paying to see. Adina Howard-Jordan, when she gets home, she’s going to cook, she’s going to clean, she’s going to fuss, (laughs) she’s going to be her. I love the fact I can be plain at home. I don’t like to always be on.
I wasn’t raised like that; always having to be done up and trying to impress somebody. I could give a got dern if you like me or not and if I look at myself in the mirror and want to kiss my got dern self, then I am ok.
Charla: You can definitely do that. We know things are different now, but we heard rumors that you could’ve been bisexual. We wanted to clear that up.
Adina: (Laughs). I’ll put it this way: I can be, do, and have as I choose. So if I choose, I am going to play.
Charla: Ok…ok… there’s nothing like hearing it from the source (laughs). That sounds good! This may be a different type of headliner now…she’s a lady in the streets and the freak in the bed! (laughs).
Adina: Hello somebody! (laughs). This gentleman and I were talking about the young girls and I said the interesting thing about now versus back then when we were younger, was that we didn’t advertise. I know I didn’t advertise. My thing was, I chose the guy, the guy didn’t choose me, so I didn’t have to do anything for them to choose me because if I didn’t choose you, I didn’t want to spend time with you no way. So I didn’t have to advertise.
Charla: We watched Life After. Your husband was like, I’m going to marry you whether you like it or not. It was cute. I know what you mean about that.
Adina: I look at the young girls now, and to each their own. I have no place to judge let alone throw stones. It’s like, you don’t have to put yourself out there like that because at the end of the day, and I say this with all respect, it comes a dime a dozen and it’s getting cheaper. There’s no need for the females to put themselves out there because at the end of the day, they’re already undressing you. It’s up to you whether you want imitation or you want the real thing. If you just want to play, great, have at it and play, and then keep it moving.
Charla: This is my motto: people do what you allow them to do. One thing Adina’s not going to do is be disrespected. That’s what the women need to understand. You’re out there with your bathing suit on, but it doesn’t mean men have to touch all over you. You have to demand your respect. That’s one thing we like about you.
Adina: Thank you!
Florence: You’re a smart business woman who is a successful artist, entrepreneur and chef. What are the secrets to being able to have success in so many areas?
Adina: My answer to that ladies is commitment and follow through. It’s about really knowing what you’re getting yourself into and when you are presented with challenges, you figure out a solution instead of focusing on the problem. Granted, you need to look at the problem, but it’s a problem with a solution. Really look at it and say, let’s be more positive, see the opportunity in this adversity and make a wise decision where we can capitalize off of it.
Commitment and follow through is so important because if you don’t follow through, you’ll never see it to completion whether you succeed and or fail because sometimes failure is success. If at the end of the day you realize it wasn’t what you thought it would be, then move on, but at least commit and follow through. Don’t give up just because there may be a bump in the road or a dead end sign because there’s always a way to get to where you need to go.
Florence: What was the hardest challenge you had to face when you first became famous?
Adina: Being famous was a challenge. I don’t like being famous. Being famous doesn’t pay the bills (laughs). Just because people know your name or face doesn’t mean you’re successful. I like my privacy. Being famous doesn’t make you successful. Look at these social media celebrities. They have a whole lot of likes but not a whole lot of money. Just because you have a lot of likes on social media, it doesn’t mean you’re famous. People don’t necessarily know you. They know of you. How fulfilling is that? How many of those thousands of followers and thousands of people who like your page will be there for you when you really need them?
Charla: That’s true. Oprah said that lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.
Adina: Lights, camera, off!
Florence: Was it difficult for men to take you seriously because of your image?
Adina: I didn’t give a damn! (laughs). I didn’t care. I didn’t take them seriously so it didn’t matter. It was one of those things…you’re talking to me, so …what? You approached me. They wanted something and they were serious about what they wanted from me (laughs). I’m just saying (laughs).
Florence: Your story is inspiring to women around the world, especially because you helped women own their own sexuality. Where you ever shy in the bedroom or have you always been sexually uninhibited?
Adina: I never recall ever being shy. Now, I think I am a little more timid when it comes to my husband. He used to be an assistant to an NBA player and he did pretty much everything he wanted to do. So now I’m like, uh, what haven’t you done, you know? Is it ok to do this? (laughs). Because he’s done so much, there’s certain things he’s not interested in doing anymore. When you’re married, it has to be a mutual thing. One of the things I learned from being married is that people’s appetites change. What you did when you were younger and wild out doing, when you get older, it’s like yeah, I don’t have a taste for that anymore; I want something different. I’ve switched it up a bit because my husband isn’t as wild as I am. But when I really want to go ahead and put the smack down…it’s like, you know who you married so it’s time to just go ahead and do the damn thing! (laughs).
Charla: This is marriage 101! (laughs).
Adina: (Laughs). Marriage is something else! The interesting thing is, men have changed so much. There’s a generation of men that look at these wild girls and say, I don’t want that. One of my nearest and dearest loved ones said one of his clients, loves oral sex, but he will not let his wife do it. A lot of men put their wives on a pedestal. I’m like, no, I need you to take me off of the pedestal because all of the wild stuff that we did to get to this point, I want to keep doing it.
It’s interesting because you always hear people say that people change when they get married. Your whole existence changes, in so many ways, good, bad and indifferent. It’s like now that I’m married, I don’t do what I used to because I have someone who’s not into everything I’m into. You have to respect that and you have to be willing to say ok, I feel you. What can we do? How far are you willing to go (laughs). Again, everybody is different.
As you get older, your palate changes. When you’re young like I was and he was, and you have opportunities that we had, we straight wild out. I know I did. I truly enjoyed life to the fullest. I still enjoy life to the fullest, just on a different level and in different ways. When you’re young, you think nothing can touch you. You don’t think about consequences. You’re like, right now, I’m living in the moment. That’s the sad part about as we get older. I think that’s why a lot of us are where we are because now we’ve conformed so much to what the world says we should be rather than being who we desire to be.
Florence: Besides your husband, music and cooking, what are some other things you’re passionate about that would shock fans?
Adina: I don’t know what will shock fans, but I love horses. I’m ridiculously allergic to them. When I look at them, it’s like, wow. They’re calming, peaceful, and mind their own business. They’re strong, silent and not to be messed with. Where I live, there are times when I’m driving home and I get to see wild horses in the desert. It’s one of the most calming and amazing visuals you will ever get to experience. I also have a passion for God. I know they’re like, what? She’s a freak, but she has a passion for God (laughs).
Florence: But we think it’s great. I can tell you are passionate about God just by your tweets and everything that you do. That doesn’t shock me at all. Adina: In my mind, there’s nothing so secretive and surprising about me. I feel like I am the woman next door. Technically, I am the woman next door to a few people. I come out, and say hi. Most of my neighbors have no idea as to who I am or what I do. At the end of the day, it’s not important. It’s making sure that I am, who I am supposed to be, so that they see God in me. I don’t want to turn people off about my God. For me, that’s my passion, and making sure I’m making my divine creator proud and I am able to touch lives the way He has called me to do so.
Florence: Now that you have evolved spiritually, mentally and emotionally, your image has also changed. How have fans reacted? Have they embraced your new image?
Adina: For people who genuinely support me, they embrace it. It’s very welcomed because they are either walking in parallel with where I am in my journey and my love for the lord, or spiritually growing or seeking it out. Because they may not know much about it, it’s embraced because I am not shoving it in their face like that. I’m sure for those who are a little lost, taken aback, confused, or feel like they’ve been hood winked, I don’t care (laughs).
If you don’t get it, you don’t get it and it wasn’t meant for you to get, so I am not going to focus on you not getting it. If you can’t support who I am, that’s cool. Not everybody is supposed to and if that’s not where you are, keep it moving. Thank you, and good night.
Florence: People think of sex when you think about Adina Howard, but there is so much more to you than sex. What do you really want the world to know about you now?
Adina: I don’t really care for people to know about me. I like my privacy, I don’t like to share a whole lot. I don’t think everyone needs to know about me. I’m a human being, that’s what all they need to know.
Florence: You once said in an interview that you’re happier being single than you are being in a relationship. Is that true for you now?
Adina: I have my moments. Again, I’ve been single longer than I’ve been married, so I have to get my single ways that I have, up and out. I do appreciate and love being an individual even though I am now a part of someone. I still value my individuality. I still value my singleness in the sense that I stand alone. And when I do have to go before my creator, I’m accountable for everything I do and everything I’ve become, so I still embrace that.
I had to learn to do it in a manner that is not so, “I don’t need you” because men need to feel needed. They are very needy individuals. I’ve had to learn to be softer, stroke egos and say, “Ok Adina, it’s not just about you anymore. Since you’ve committed to this, you have to commit and follow through.”
Florence: What were two of the biggest challenges you experienced in your past that have made you an even stronger woman?
Adina: Wow. Everything that I’ve been through. From the beginning of my journey, the challenges with my parents, collectively and individually, dealing with the death of my grandpoppi, which is my mom’s dad, changed me. Being married, being a step-mother, being Adina Howard per se, has molded me to be who I am.
Everything I have ever done, good, bad, or indifferent; everything that has happened to me has made me who I am today, the person who is still standing on solid ground. If I had not gone through what I had gone through, I wouldn’t be as faith-filled and faithful as I am today. I wouldn’t be as wise or knowledgeable.
Florence: Who is Adina Howard behind closed doors?
Adina: I am every woman. I cook, clean, help pay the bills around this joint (laughs). I don’t just sit on my butt and just be me. I’m like everyone else. I am human. There’s nothing different about me other than a lot of people know my name or face. I’m a woman, mother, wife, daughter, aunt, niece, and God’s child. I am a granddaughter. I play the typical role most people play. There’s nothing special about me behind closed doors. I’m clumsy; I bump into things a lot (laughs). I’m clumsy as hell. I just chill and be easy.
I read articles online; there’s one title I came across often that says celebrities aren’t like us. It’s like, why do they do that? They are like you. You just don’t have their money, but there’s nothing different. Most of us happen to have success or money but honestly, you can be successful and making money on your level, so does that make me better and or less than you or vice versa? We just are who we are. Let’s be clear, just because some of these people have money, doesn’t mean they aren’t going through it. At this moment, we just don’t see it.
Florence: When is your documentary, A Story of Sexual Liberation, being released and what can fans expect to learn about you from the film?
Adina: I don’t know when it will be released. I’ll have to talk to Gezus Zaire. He’s followed me for as long as I can remember, the rebel graham is what he goes by on Instagram. He wanted to make sure everybody knew my story. He was so perplexed as to how I was on the scene one minute and then the next minute, I completely disappeared. A lot of people will find out why I walked away from the industry. For those who didn’t get to see Life After, this will bring some clarification and be a little more in-depth.
Charla: We know you did an interview about why you left the industry, that so we wanted to do something different. Adina: Being different will get you far. Blending in with everybody else, first of all, is so boring. Nobody strives to be extraordinary. This extra ordinary mediocre mindset has everybody in the same pool. That’s what this industry has become. Very few people are striving to be excellent and be different. Everyone is blending in because everyone wants the same thing, and the majority of that is fame. They aren’t thinking much further than that.
Florence: When can we expect to hear new Adina Howard music?
Adina: New music is coming very, very, very soon. We have a situation in the works that is looking very promising, so hopefully in the next 3 or 4 months, we’ll be able to bless you all with something.
For more information about Adina Howard visit the following websites:
http://www.adinahoward.com/
https://www.facebook.com/adinahoward
https://twitter.com/AdinaHoward
http://instagram.com/adinahowardjordan
View the trailer for A Story of Sexual Liberation, here:
http://vimeo.com/114682346
Listen to Adina’s latest song, Switch:
http://youtu.be/hZxhIJ9aHug
